I pressed the “submit” button, replaced the pencils in my hair, and sat, breathing deeply, for the minute-that-is-a-year it takes to get the results. 63%. My third fail. With six of the seven exams completed, and all the CPL hours logged, I had to wonder ... was I failing this exam on purpose? Was my subconscious in league with The Imp of the Perverse, failing me because I’m scared of what comes next?
It was never my intention to go onto CPL, but somehow, post-PPL, I couldn’t stop, felt as if I had so much more to learn. “I’ll just do a few of the exams” I said to myself. “And some navs. Oh, and maybe a tail-wheel endorsement”.
Before I knew it, I had the required amount of hours for the test, and just the one exam left. The one I kept failing...
I haven’t flown since that third fail, of a month ago. Instead, I’ve taken time out to think. And I’ve whittled it down to this - confidence. As in, I don’t have any. It’s clear to me that I need more than the regulation 70 hours PIC before I’m ready to sit the test. I’m just not commanding enough.
So, what are a girl’s options, when confidence is blocking the path to the dream of Flying For a Living?
- give up. If you haven’t got it after all these hours, maybe you never will??
Hell no! Plenty of famous people have been slow starters. What I lack in talent, I make up for in enthusiasm. Giving up is not an option.
- take a confidence-building course.
That would be fine, if one weren’t such a cynic. The idea of pumping my hands in the air and shouting “go, ego!” lead by a man with very white teeth, gives me the shivers.
- build your own confidence.
Yeps, that sounds like the ticket. And what better way than a round Oz trip, solo, with only Gary Garmin for company?
And that’s how I came to it.
I have one month to complete the preparations, organise an aircraft and gather all the advice/tips necessary. I’m as shit-scared as I am excited.
This blog is to be a document of that trip, from the prep to the final landing in Bankstown.
Thank you for reading!
